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gracehelbig:

Heads up, tumblracket ballz! Check out this funny show with lots of funny ladies that I get to be part of!  It’s got ladies!  And they’re funny!  And they’re GIRLS!

 We are all totally funny and stuff!

gracehelbig:

Heads up, tumblracket ballz! Check out this funny show with lots of funny ladies that I get to be part of!  It’s got ladies!  And they’re funny!  And they’re GIRLS!

 We are all totally funny and stuff!

Hello, Ross!

To the Christian group that boycotted Gay Day at Disneyworld:
If you love DisneyWorld, you love gay people whether you know it or not. The people who made Cinderella’s dress? Gay. The people who choreographed the parade? Gay. The man walking around dressed as Aladin with the silky vest? I mean, do I have to say it?

It’s great that you spent thousands of dollars flying a banner over Disney to warn people about Gay Day… It’s like, “Sorry poor kids, can’t help you today, busy harassing some gay people that want to ride a rollercoaster.”

It’s never easy to be chosen, never easy to be called.

Heavy is the head that wears the crown, don’t let the greatness get you down.

My new roommates are awesome

Whipped Cream vodka. doggies. valium. hash. fierce belty bitches. how.

we’re not cockyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy we just loooooooooooooooove ourselves. BETCH.

I want some raspberry falafel, STAT.

PAPER IS THE NEW TREE!

that makes so much sense.

PENIS.

Spelling is hard.

are you still married to alice ripley?
Anonymous

No, I’m not. And I gave up custody of all the children, too!

I’m not cocky…

I just LOVE myself…

Yes.